Developing High Trust

Hahaha! Gotcha!

i know. That title is so captivating. & NO! I do not hate my life. I love it as it is. Although i know it could have been way better.

I was reading some blogs before writing this. I discovered that i seldom write personal things here. Well i try not to reveal my personal story too much as i know it may bore others. (Although some part of me says that people love to know what’s happening to my personal life. Hahaha!) Wait! Something just popped up. Never mind. I forgot the quote by Dale Carnegie. Yes i am a self developement fan.

Feeling a bit emotional nowadays. Good and the not so good of emotional feeling.

For now, i am very appreciative of the fact that APEX (Ace PSLE Exams) is helping Madrasah Wak Tanjong. I’m glad that APEX is able to render her contribution to more people. I’m truly gratified when this happened. Of course i would really like to thank those people who made this possible. Without them and Allah’s grace, APEX would not have existed in the first place. So thank you Hannah Loh, Azhar Ismail, Abbas Khan, Mas’Aini Isnin, Mas’uud Samsudin, Noor Sarah Abdul Rahman, Shaza Amalina, Shahiddin Ithnin, Hanna Taufiq, Azry, Bahari, Ariff, Zubaidah, Nisha Rafiq, & Ridhwan Basor.  Thank you people! Deepest gratitude holds within me.

And not forgetting the mentors who were there to support the whole program. I really appreciate them. I wish i could return them a favour however no favour is better than the rewards from Allah swt.

It has been quite an emotion ride for me. Well at least for some moments. Mas’uud speech during the challenge shield 6 gave me a wake up call -when i was watching a record video footage at facebook, really touched my heart. I am still thinking about the ukhuwwah and how i can play my part in the unity of the muslims and people in the world. Thank you for that inspiring speech that made me ponder yet again.

Mas’uud Speech during NUSMS Challenge Shield 06 - 2008/2009

Another touching subject would be Umm Sofiyyah’s blog post which triggered me to write now. She said something which really soothe my heart. Thank you Umm Sofiyyah. Having you in our life is a great blessing indeed. My apologies to you should i have wronged you in many ways ever since you became an apex committee member. I just wanna say that i value your contribution and i hope you can give your utmost best like what you have been doing now. Thank you Umm Sofiyyah! My sincere salutations to you.

http://ummsofiyyah.wordpress.com/2009/01/23/the-reasons-why/

There several things that humbled me these few days. The Solar eclipse today was one of them. it made me think. Rabbana maa halaqta haza bathila, subhanaka faqina azabanar. (Sorry if my arabic is not right. Please correct me.) Dunno why the eclipse reminds me of that verse. Nevertheless i sat there looking at the eclipse thinking how great and purposeful the creation of Allah is. And may Allah save me from hellfire. Something that i really fear although my actions show otherwise much to my own regrets. I long the sweetness of being in love with Allah. And i wish He could give me back the state that i’ve always wanted. O Allah fulfill the wishes of my heart although i don’t deserve that little bit.

I told Sarah & the gang that i wanted to uzlah first before i get married while Sarah wanted to perform her umrah. Wanting to devote and avoid the material world (uzlah) only emphasize my deep desire to feel Allah’s love again. Coming back to the spiritual world is something i really long for. For the journey before this is the sweetest of all.

Despite my mischief toward so many people like Mas’Aini, Hanna Taufiq, Sarah AR, Farhana Bibi and the rest, i do feel a need to keep my mouth shut and just ponder and reflect. Whenever i do this, i will be reminded of Rizhan. A beloved brother whom i miss so much. Especially the times that we were very close.

http://MohdRizhan.Blogspot.Com

His entries in his blogs always touch the deepest part of my emotions. I dunno how he does that. Just wanna thank him for continuing to write on although he almost give up. Alhamdulillah he did not. I’m glad i could relate to his entries although i feel “outcast” for putting a comment cos he attracts all the scholarly muslims in his blog. I am truly humbled about this.

Another thing is the thought of Ameerah Al Mutahar. She reminded and thank me for my previous post back in Oct ‘08. I was truly humbled (yet again) when i read that post of mine. It made me stop all my work and ponder again.

http://hellomynameiseusof.blogspot.com/2008/10/thank-you-note-for-october-08.html

It’s been quite some time since i write a thank you message. I am very regretful for not fulfilling it for the month of Nov, Dec and January. Not that i have no one to thank. I have many to thank and yet i did not fulfill them. My apologies to all whom i owe a ‘Thank You’. And thank you Ameerah for reminding me. It was really very nice of you to do that unintentionally.

Something random. A video from TedTalk.

David Hoffman: How Would You Feel if Your Lost Everything?

Martin Seligman: What Positive Psychology Can Help You Become

This entry was posted on Tuesday, January 27th, 2009 at 1:52 am and is filed under Personal. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.